RESULTS-DRIVEN CUISINE

We believe in serving you through a bespoke experience

Pepperoni John began as a formal journey to scientifically understand my own preference as it relates to eating food. Good food, shitty food, ANY food. Through my entire life I’ve done the same exercise over and over. It goes like this: name food, consume food, decide if food is good or bad, then decide if repetition is necessary.

Seems fine? Maybe for a normal person on a day-to-day basis. I am not a normal person. I like food. I love food. Again, I LOVE FOOD. And I don’t like unpleasant surprises when it comes to my food expectations. I want predictable results. I want to hit a home run every time I’m at the plate. And I want to dream about what it’s like beforehand.

Pizza is the best food in the world. There’s no question. It’s gorgeous. It’s elegant. It aromatic. It parties hard. It can be as prissy or as punch-drunk as you prefer. It makes all of this worth it. What I want to know – how I can manufacture a moment we get to enjoy pizza together?

Why are we doing this?

Yes – life’s too short for shitty pizza.

First, if you don’t know what shitty pizza is, click HERE.

Now, fast forward to your deathbed. Think about it. You’re screwed. Moving hurts. Your family is there, but they feel sorry for you. Only a few moments remaining before you conclude your life. So do you think to yourself: “I ate the best slice of pizza that my mind can conceive.”

I will be saying yes. I personally want that so bad. I want to think back on my life and know that A) I possessed the capacity to understand exactly what pizza is and B) that I pursued with full intention the opportunity to create the taste-vision that is in my head (think Goofy Movie pizza). Don’t waste your breath eating shitty pizza. Please.

Eat good pizza. Enjoy great pizza. Great pizza comes from PREFERENCE. Great pizza comes from understanding what you want and getting just that. I will teach you preference and I will execute getting you what you want.